Girls, come ask our boys...

Sweetymary · 06-16-2008 01:19

I am going to sticky this topic at the top so that if any of our girls have questions for the boys please post them here only. I ask that no more topics be created here from girls asking boys questions. Just post all those questions here girls!

Take Care and enjoy!
KrissieLee

hi everyone

im glad the topic is being helpful & useful to all the girls in the world lol

In this topic, girls, come & ask questions or counseling to our boys who, like perfect gentleman, will be glad to cooperate

The guys will help us know what our Boys think, what they don't want to tell us and what they've been trying to tell us content3

have fun everyone... bisou

The Permanent counselors are:

* Kellieleah
* Plaidking

special thanks to all the boys who are counseling our gurls wink

kisses&hugs

ps: guys if you want to be a permanent counselor just send me an inbox and i will write your name in this post... smile

Last edited by sweetymary (03-27-2009 23:35)

Sweetymary · 06-16-2008 02:13

ok i guess i will be asking first hoping that one nice guy will answer ;

after how much time you think a girl should tell her BF 'i love you'...when she feels it / even though it's just after some days/ or when she feels she is loved in return?

Kellie Leah · 06-16-2008 05:28

Ah the love word. If you just met the guy and have been only dating a few days or weeks, I'd steer clear of dropping the L-bomb. At that point neither of you really knows each other very well and saying, "I love you," could be misconstrued. If you're really overwhelmed by feelings of glorious splendor for your brand new boy toy, it would be better to just say something like, "You're the best, (insert boyfriend name here), I love spending time with you." At least consider waiting until you've been dating for a few months before saying it.

If you've been friends for awhile (more than one year) and then say started dating because you have so much fun together and the chemistry just develops...saying I love you within the first few weeks of dating wouldn't be taken negatively in my opinion. Just be prepared that while you may be ready to say I love you, most guys may not feel as comfortable returning those three wonderful little words. If he cares about you, and obviously he thinks you’re great since you’ve been friends for so long, he’ll be a gentleman about it. Something along the lines of, “That’s very sweet of you to say." Just don’t get hurt or offended if he doesn’t say it back right away. Be careful here though, if something goes amiss you may have to consider losing your friend if the romantic relationship fizzles and ends.

You'll know he loves you by the way he treats you, the way he talks to you. There really isn't a right time or a wrong time to tell someone you love them. If you feel it and you mean it then say it. Love is such a rare thing, so when you do find it with someone special, revel in it and cherish it. You never know when it will be stolen away.

Lovetaken · 06-16-2008 05:52

Hello, My name is Destiny (in real life!) But on this game i'm Lovetaken i was wondering somethin if w cold be friends? smile

Expired · 06-16-2008 08:58

Friends with Destiny? sounds like a title for a Tomb Raider movie.

OnlyHannah · 06-16-2008 09:03

ok ive got a question about boys

if i say im not ready yet, do you think he will leave me?

ive been scared stiff for weeks, i want him to be happy and i dont want to loose him, my best friend did it and he left her, ive been with him a year, have i left him waiting too long?

AlexM1990 · 06-16-2008 10:09

OnlyHannah wrote:
ok ive got a question about boys

if i say im not ready yet, do you think he will leave me?

ive been scared stiff for weeks, i want him to be happy and i dont want to loose him, my best friend did it and he left her, ive been with him a year, have i left him waiting too long?

If he really loves you he won't leave you. Whether a relationship survives or not is based on sex, then it's not a very strong one, imo.

If he truly cares then he will wait until you are ready. Talk to him about your worries and your fears...if he cares then he'll understand.

Linjaton · 06-16-2008 10:58

OnlyHannah wrote:
ok ive got a question about boys

if i say im not ready yet, do you think he will leave me?

ive been scared stiff for weeks, i want him to be happy and i dont want to loose him, my best friend did it and he left her, ive been with him a year, have i left him waiting too long?

I think U should give it a go. I know my opinion is quite controversial one, but if U've been considering having sex before marriage I assume that there are no religious reasons for U to avoid pre marriage sex. Everybody thinks it is such a big deal-the firs time. It is usually not a blissfull comfortable event. U're 18-it's enough I suppose. If U really LOVE the guy and he loves U back- try it, he'll take care of U. Sex is fun. But think of the contraception first!!! Don't push too hard, don't plan it (unless the contraception is concerned), make it spontanous. Good luck and don't worry bisou

IceGem · 06-16-2008 13:10

Kellie Leah wrote:
Ah the love word. If you just met the guy and have been only dating a few days or weeks, I'd steer clear of dropping the L-bomb. At that point neither of you really knows each other very well and saying, "I love you," could be misconstrued. If you're really overwhelmed by feelings of glorious splendor for your brand new boy toy, it would be better to just say something like, "You're the best, (insert boyfriend name here), I love spending time with you." At least consider waiting until you've been dating for a few months before saying it.

If you've been friends for awhile (more than one year) and then say started dating because you have so much fun together and the chemistry just develops...saying I love you within the first few weeks of dating wouldn't be taken negatively in my opinion. Just be prepared that while you may be ready to say I love you, most guys may not feel as comfortable returning those three wonderful little words. If he cares about you, and obviously he thinks you’re great since you’ve been friends for so long, he’ll be a gentleman about it. Something along the lines of, “That’s very sweet of you to say." Just don’t get hurt or offended if he doesn’t say it back right away. Be careful here though, if something goes amiss you may have to consider losing your friend if the romantic relationship fizzles and ends.

You'll know he loves you by the way he treats you, the way he talks to you. There really isn't a right time or a wrong time to tell someone you love them. If you feel it and you mean it then say it. Love is such a rare thing, so when you do find it with someone special, revel in it and cherish it. You never know when it will be stolen away.

Haha! I think I must have an exception to the rule. My fella told me he loved me after 2 weeks. Granted I had known him before, but only to have a drink with, not as a close friend or anything. I was out with the girls in a club, and a txt came through. It said "I really think I love you" I txt back saying you must be drunk! haha. Then he said "no, I'm not, it really is how I feel" so I said to him, if you really feel it then tell me in the morning and i'll know your not drunk and dont know what your saying. True to his word. The next morning I got that txt! Bless him. How cute. Haha.

Kellie Leah · 06-16-2008 13:45

OnlyHannah wrote:
ok ive got a question about boys

if i say im not ready yet, do you think he will leave me?

ive been scared stiff for weeks, i want him to be happy and i dont want to loose him, my best friend did it and he left her, ive been with him a year, have i left him waiting too long?

And above all things remember that you're worth waiting for.

He might leave, but if you're not ready, you're not ready. Tell him that. If he leaves you because you don't want to be physically intimate with him, he wasn't worth your time in the first place. Take the time to explain why you're not ready. When you do decide that you're ready make sure you use protection.

I've found that being physically intimate usually just happens on its own when both people involved want it to happen and it comes more naturally the more relationships you have been in. If he's a gentleman he'll treat you right and above all don't put to much pressure on either of you to make it perfect the first time. Being physically intimate, like so many other things in life, becomes better with time and experience.

And by all means do not do this if you're scared stiff. Being coerced into doing something because you're afriad of loosing this guy is all of the wrong reasons to take you're relationship to the next level of physical intimacy. It's your body and you control who has access to it.

He should be happy just to be your boyfriend, being physically intimate with him is not one of the criterions for his or your happiness when both parties involved aren't ready for that kind of commitment.

Did your friend's boyfriend leave her after she told him no to being physically intimate? Or after, keep in mind that just because you're physically intimate with someone won't be the magic tie that binds you together for all time, he could still lose interest or you could meet someone amazing and new and want to move on as well.

I'm hoping this guy has been with you for a year because he really likes you as a person regardless of any other implications. Just ask yourself what you want out of the relationship and make it known to him. If he keeps pressuring you to be intimate and you are put off by this; dump him and find someone who will respect your limits. His happiness isn't something you can control. He might leave you if you tell him no, because maybe that's what he needs out of a relationship and so he may be inclined to go out and get it. Just be honest with him about your feelings on the issue if he can't wait for you to be ready both of you should move on and start seeing other people.

As far as keeping him waiting for too long, doesn't sound like you have, since he's still around. Remember it's all about what you are comfortable with. Everyone has different moral criteria, just make sure that whatever you do in a relationship that you're honest with yourself and your partner and that the feelings are mutual.

Good luck.

Kellie Leah · 06-16-2008 13:53

IceGem wrote:
Kellie Leah wrote:
Ah the love word. ...

You'll know he loves you by the way he treats you, the way he talks to you. There really isn't a right time or a wrong time to tell someone you love them. If you feel it and you mean it then say it. Love is such a rare thing, so when you do find it with someone special, revel in it and cherish it. You never know when it will be stolen away.
Haha! I think I must have an exception to the rule. My fella told me he loved me after 2 weeks. Granted I had known him before, but only to have a drink with, not as a close friend or anything. I was out with the girls in a club, and a txt came through. It said "I really think I love you" I txt back saying you must be drunk! haha. Then he said "no, I'm not, it really is how I feel" so I said to him, if you really feel it then tell me in the morning and i'll know your not drunk and dont know what your saying. True to his word. The next morning I got that txt! Bless him. How cute. Haha.

I can't believe he texted you to tell you he loved you for the first time! I'm glad you thought it was cute. I'm not sure if any of my ex-girlfriends would have been as tickled by it as you were.

IceGem · 06-16-2008 14:06

I think he txt me it in case I didn't approve. He is very quiet, and when it comes to talking he is not very good at finding his words and saying what he means, so I think putting it in a message gave him a lil wall to hide behind just in case I didn't respond well. Of course then the next day he gave me the biggest cuddle and told me properly! haha.

I think it's cos I know it's just his way that I found it so cute, I dont think every man could pull that off with a good reception tho!

Sweetymary · 06-16-2008 21:41

ConnerM wrote:
OnlyHannah wrote:
ok ive got a question about boys

if i say im not ready yet, do you think he will leave me?

ive been scared stiff for weeks, i want him to be happy and i dont want to loose him, my best friend did it and he left her, ive been with him a year, have i left him waiting too long?
If he really loves you he won't leave you. Whether a relationship survives or not is based on sex, then it's not a very strong one, imo.

If he truly cares then he will wait until you are ready. Talk to him about your worries and your fears...if he cares then he'll understand.

oh you're so right connerM if a guy really loves you he will understand u. & if he doesn't well he's the one losing! it means he didn't deserve u & it's good that u break up smile

Bbtan · 06-16-2008 21:58

Kellie Leah wrote:
OnlyHannah wrote:
ok ive got a question about boys

if i say im not ready yet, do you think he will leave me?

ive been scared stiff for weeks, i want him to be happy and i dont want to loose him, my best friend did it and he left her, ive been with him a year, have i left him waiting too long?
And above all things remember that you're worth waiting for.

......

Good luck.

totally agree!
don't be afraid, if he leaves, he's not worth it.
and btw... KL. I think I'm falling in love with you! big_smile

Bbtan · 06-16-2008 22:00

sweetymary wrote:
ok i guess i will be asking first hoping that one nice guy will answer ;

after how much time you think a girl should tell her BF 'i love you'...when she feels it / even though it's just after some days/ or when she feels she is loved in return?

i find that the L word scares guys away... if you love him, show him, don't say it that much. but let it drop once or twice in special events. wink

Sweetymary · 06-16-2008 23:33

bbtan wrote:
Kellie Leah wrote:
OnlyHannah wrote:
ok ive got a question about boys

if i say im not ready yet, do you think he will leave me?

ive been scared stiff for weeks, i want him to be happy and i dont want to loose him, my best friend did it and he left her, ive been with him a year, have i left him waiting too long?
And above all things remember that you're worth waiting for.

......

Good luck.
totally agree!
don't be afraid, if he leaves, he's not worth it.
and btw... KL. I think I'm falling in love with you!

falling in lovz with him too!!! he seems a nice guy coeur

Chris05 · 06-17-2008 02:10

im new to this some 1 make me feel good about this game

Kellie Leah · 06-17-2008 05:12

chris05 wrote:
im new to this some 1 make me feel good about this game

That's a bit off topic, but are you enjoying yorself? Then that's all that really matters, you shouldn't need or want anyone else's approval in order to enjoy a game.

have fun and enjoy the day. fashions are fabulous! peace.

Kellie Leah · 06-17-2008 05:21

bbtan wrote:
sweetymary wrote:
ok i guess i will be asking first hoping that one nice guy will answer ;

after how much time you think a girl should tell her BF 'i love you'...when she feels it / even though it's just after some days/ or when she feels she is loved in return?
i find that the L word scares guys away... if you love him, show him, don't say it that much. but let it drop once or twice in special events.

That's very sweet of you to say BB. Why do you think guys get spooked when a girl tells them she loves them?

Annabelle Ablewood · 06-17-2008 05:25

Its easier to say things like "I love your smile" or "I love your sense of humour" smile

Kellie Leah · 06-17-2008 05:27

sweetymary wrote:
bbtan wrote:
Kellie Leah wrote:

And above all things remember that you're worth waiting for.

......

Good luck.
totally agree!
don't be afraid, if he leaves, he's not worth it.
and btw... KL. I think I'm falling in love with you!
falling in lovz with him too!!! he seems a nice guy

Thank-you SweetMary. You and BB are starting to make me blush. Thanks >8D

Kellie Leah · 06-17-2008 05:40

Annabelle Ablewood wrote:
Its easier to say things like "I love your smile" or "I love your sense of humour"

Early on I think this is the best way to approach the whole love issue. Saying you love a specific thing a person does or personality trait or just something that really delights you about the person you're with will not likely be received negatively.

I don't think saying I love you would be taken negatively either, but really early on, when you're just getting to know each other, I think it can be a red flag and or turnoff to both parties. I think the question most of us ask ourselves; wow they already love me so soon? How quickly will they change their minds seeing as we've only known each other for a few weeks? Call it the cynicism of adults, burnt by love in the past.

So you've met someone new and wonderful, just soak it all up and enjoy it, there's no reason to get super serious too quickly. And I think, for most boys, that's where the negative connotation comes from hearing a woman tell them, "I love you," very early on in a dating relationship. Everyone likes to have their ego stroked a bit, so saying how great you think someone is and why early on can help a lot in defining why you’re with this new and amazing person.

Genuine flattery will get you everywhere. >8D

Sweetymary · 10-11-2008 01:02

thanks for your time and good advices kellie
i have this huge problem with my bf and i need a guy to help me.
so anyone wanna help? its a good cause lol

Bar8ie · 10-14-2008 18:12

Ok this thread is old.. but if a guy still wants to help i really would appreciate it.

I've been in a relationship for 2 years and now planning the date of engagement.
6 months ago(which is still carrying on) my boyfriend is acting kind of controlling.. as advising me (more like telling me) what to wear, when to go out, with who to go out, time limit and etc, its not really to the point of abuse (i dont mean physical ofcourse) but its relly bothering me that he's attemting to control me..
Could anyone suggest what can he be thinking? is it some crack in our trust,? or is he showing his true colours after all this time? or its his way of being more carrying???
Anyone? plz?

ChapaLapStick · 10-14-2008 18:20

That was how my ex was... dated for a year, then talked about marrage, and planed a date... then... BANG... the change...

I say leave him... My ex was a great guy, but as it got closer to the day we were planning he got worse... and now... he drinks all the time ... and he has a new girl.
So I saw leave him Bar8ie...
Just think it can only get worse... if he is doing this now, think of what in a few years could do...
I beg you leave him... PLEASE!!!!

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Girls, come ask our boys...

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Girls, come ask our boys...

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OnlyHannah wrote:

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#9 06-16-2008 13:10

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Kellie Leah wrote:

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OnlyHannah wrote:

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IceGem wrote:

Kellie Leah wrote:

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ConnerM wrote:

OnlyHannah wrote:

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OnlyHannah wrote:

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sweetymary wrote:

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OnlyHannah wrote:

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chris05 wrote:

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bbtan wrote:

sweetymary wrote:

#20 06-17-2008 05:25

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sweetymary wrote:

bbtan wrote:

Kellie Leah wrote:

#22 06-17-2008 05:40

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Annabelle Ablewood wrote:

#23 10-11-2008 01:02

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