Single females - Independent or Lonely?

I was with a man whom I thought I was totally in love with! In fact I was so blind that I let the loser move in with me! for five years all I did was work, cook, clean, and make sure I always looked his ideal! What a fool I was! He was lazy, self centered, and controling! If I took a nap, he called me lazy, if I didn't fix myself up, he said I was letting myself go, if he couldn't reach me on my cell, I was cheating! And worse of all, I didn't realize at the time the effect it had on my son! I feel terrible!! I finally let that jerk loose even though It was still hard to let go, simply because this was what I was use to for so long, I didn't even really know how to be otherwise, and I didn't know how he would respond! But I'm so glad I did, my only regret is that I didn't kick his butt to the curb sooner! Now I am able to give my son my undivided attention, and I am free to be me! Sleep when I want, eat what I want, go where I want! I never realized that It was ok to just be me, and not what someone else wants me to be! I've been single now for about 7 years, and NO, I don't wish any otherwise! I love my freedom! Maybe one day down the line I'll find someone worthy of giving my heart to, but I'll except no substitutes! I've since grown individually,and spiritually, and I'm just enjoying life!

Iv always hated being in relationships because I find it really suffocating. But the guy im with at the moment is really great because we have totally separate lives (different friends, different ambitions, different opinions) so i dont feel like my independance is being threatened. Its kind of like being single, but with all the benefits of having a boyfriend, I can spend time with friends wheneva I like but also have the security of a relationship.

I would always say that being single is loads better than being in a less than perfect relationship. You might find the right guy one day, but if you dont then thats okay too. I think its really sad when girls focus completely on finding a man or put all their effort into a relationship, your main priority should be yourself.

Well im in Australia and i study art, so im thinking American, san francisco or maybe Dubai??I just know that in a year and a half im ready to graduate and leave. Mind you he has said that because of his job he can move, but that doesnt mean he will move, and when he says that he will consider it, i dont think he will. He's very christian and I really believe that his idea of the future is me + him, two kids living around the corner from his parents house. And that is my absolute worst fear. I want to live art, and live in an art minded city surrounded by history and music and architecture. Im really confused.

LadiiEva wrote:

I have been single all my life, never had a serious relationship.

ALL YOUR LIFE :o
gee, you're seventeen, it's not like you're supposed to be engaged or something :D

liesha wrote:

Well im in Australia and i study art, so im thinking American, san francisco or maybe Dubai??I just know that in a year and a half im ready to graduate and leave. Mind you he has said that because of his job he can move, but that doesnt mean he will move, and when he says that he will consider it, i dont think he will. He's very christian and I really believe that his idea of the future is me + him, two kids living around the corner from his parents house. And that is my absolute worst fear. I want to live art, and live in an art minded city surrounded by history and music and architecture. Im really confused.

Then maybe you shoud just go without him.
I think that if you stay just for him you'll be sufficated and always will regret that you didn't do what your heart wanted.
It's the hardest thing to do but in the end maybe the best cos' you might hold him responsible for the things you'll be missing.
You could also meet halfway by going just for six months to wherever you wanna go and do what you wanna do and then settle down with your partner!

Jackye wrote:

I got dumped by my boyfriend last year. Ever since then, I've refused to date anybody, and I'm so much happier. 16 is some god awful age I'm suffering through right now, but unlike all of my codependent, agitating friends who always need a boyfriend, I don't. My best friend is involved in a long term relationship, and some days I feel like he is her best friend, so yeah I get lonely. But for the most part, not being tied down by a guy is good. My ex boyfriend is in some dippy, stupid relationship now with his ideal girlfriend, but all I hear from people is how lonely he is, or what an jerk he makes out of himself. And he obviously wasn't the right guy, but someone out there is. Anyone else been through something similar?

I'd like the lobster.

Bobbee wrote:

Jackye wrote:

I got dumped by my boyfriend last year. Ever since then, I've refused to date anybody, and I'm so much happier. 16 is some god awful age I'm suffering through right now, but unlike all of my codependent, agitating friends who always need a boyfriend, I don't. My best friend is involved in a long term relationship, and some days I feel like he is her best friend, so yeah I get lonely. But for the most part, not being tied down by a guy is good. My ex boyfriend is in some dippy, stupid relationship now with his ideal girlfriend, but all I hear from people is how lonely he is, or what an jerk he makes out of himself. And he obviously wasn't the right guy, but someone out there is. Anyone else been through something similar?

I'd like the lobster.

Hahahaha I Love you

i am single and loving ittttttt !

seriosuly if you're under 25 (random number) get out there and enjoy being young and don't worry about relationships

my advice aha xx

Lol i havent had a serious relationship till about 6 months ago. and its amazing i love it.
But yeah. my boyfriend is so whipped i love it lol i have control over the relationship at least he isnt controling over me which i love so much for reasons..

Independant!
I am sick of my taken friends trying to set me up with people or jumping to conclusions when I mention a male name. I'm bi and they don't do it with girls names which is also very annoying. I like being single. Just because they enjoy having a relationship doesn't mean they need to shove it down my throat trying to tell me how miserable I must be. I'm not - deal with it.

chavpants wrote:

I've kept myself subscribed to this topic in the hope it will help me get over my recent heartbreak.  It's officially been a month and after my last post on this thread I'm still hurting and I feel really lonely now...
Pleeeease please please tell me this will pass?

It will pass, I promise. Most of us have been there and it does fade. Just keep giving it time. And chocolate/ice cream. That helps too.

I'm single nowadays and I don't feel lonely!
I think that what really matter is if you're good with yourself! (And I'm great and happy with myself nowadays)