Why, do you think, some women always seem to be so bitter?

I don't think that it is women, but people in general.  The number of people on anti-depressants is staggering. People are stressed about money, how to raise their children,  their relationships, their jobs, etc.  While these problems certainly aren't new, it seems that they are bigger than what they were 50 years ago.  Striving to keep up, whether it be your finances, success, or lifestyle has gotten to be too much for most people.  When we inevitably fail to maintain the the lifestyle we want to mimic we get angry, impatient, and jaded.  We tend to take these feelings out on others.  Wherever you go you can see this kind of "quiet hostility".  Standing in line at the grocery, you can see people slowly pushing up on people and almost daring them to say anything.  We seem to have lost respect for civility.  We forget that leaning on one another is something we need, and neighbors and strangers are people that we need to reach out to, instead of being suspect and fearful of them.  The more we learn about each other the more comfortable and happy we will be.  I think we could lose a lot of our anger and bitterness just by trying to take the time to be kind to each other once in a while.  I realize that this sounds very simple, but it is an important part of being healthy and happy, and it is too often over looked.



Sorry that I rambled on, my thoughts are a bit scattered this morning.  I need more coffee! 

Some women just can't let go of any anger so it builds up until eventually it just completely poisons them and its to hard to go back to being happy and carefree so they end up resenting everyone else who is!

lanarenee wrote:

I think bitterness goes beyond just being cranky.  I think is not being able to experience joy or have a positive outlook.  It's not being able to move past something bad that happened to you, maybe holding a grudge or being unable to forgive.  When you are bitter you can't communicate with others, build new relationships, grow and take constructive criticism, and you can't move on with your life.  It's being angry at the world, CYNICAL, and RESENTFUL.  It's being trapped in the past or feeling victimized and not like an empowered woman.

Hey this sounds like me  except I do feel empowered . I llike being pesimistic because when ur a pesimist ur never dissapointed. For me people don't just do nice things because they care, its because they expect something, they always lie and u can't depend on anyone but ur self. I could say a whole lot more but this is such a broad topic that I don't even know where to start and where to end, so this will just have to do for now. 

GUess what? I just met a real bitter woman.

I never knew being bitter can be so evil. Anyway, her 2 boys father, she left him and she was so angrry with the boys father, she would hit them and keep them in a little back room at the back of the house, in the cold.

However, she would treat her daughter, totally different, she's got a large bedroom all to herself, and in winter, her daughter's room will be heated.

I thought mother's generally treat all their children with the same warm, nurturing love no matter who the father of the child is...

This seems strange to me, because I cant imaging a woman showing her bitterness in public.
I think its the wrong word to use, becuase I wouldnt call myself a bitter person, in general I am a very happy and friendly person, but certain things that have happened in my past that I have never got over and has just built and built inside me has caused me to every so often feel bitter feelings about what has happened.
I would never show that off to anyone and I would especially never take out my feelings on someone else.
That is just plain wrong.

i think its what youve bin through in life a lot of people tell me i get very angry and am not very nice sometimes i had a bad childhood im nt blaming my anger for tht but i think it plays a big part in it but this is in my experience i dnt no about other people

Some people just blame everyone else for being bitter.

They would blame their parents, their up-bringing, their social class, their partners, etc.
It seems hard for them to take a look at themselves...

alexis6969 wrote:

rosiefargo35 wrote:

yes it all starts inside. one has to realize that a messed up childhood stops being an excusse when your an adult and can decide your own future.

I could not agree more.

I know of so many people who blame their parents for their financial situation, their jobs and everything.. just because they were abused and mistreated and sent to a home etc.
I think it's their own decision to stand up and make a change.
To say, SC*EW them with the past and take the reins and take charge of their own life instead of mulling in self pity...

Excellent comments in here. Thank you ladies.

I am still of the belief that it is a choice. You can choose to rise above whatever things twisted your outlook on life, or you can choose to have a bad attitude. I am one of those ladies that will actually stand up for myself if any anger is directed at me. And I hope you all do the same because you all are NOBODY's doormat.

Thanks again for posting ladies.

And for anyone that isn't clear of exactly what a bitter woman is, I have read a few good examples in here, just have a scroll up. ;O)

Seems like it's all already been said!

Watch Jerry Springer, Jeremy Kyle, Montel Williams Show.. etc. etc.

You will realize bitterness is not just an angry state of mind.. it makes people crazy...

It's no wonder Americans refer to anger as 'being mad'... because they are right!

tikachu wrote:

I personally think bitterness is just a security blanket or shield.  These woman are actually quite insecure, and to protect themselves they feel that they need to act a certain way to show that they are independent and strong, when really it does the opposite.  There are so many other ways to go about proving that you are a strong woman.

I don't think so.
Bitter women don't act strong. They usually are strong.
In many cases, evil, vindictive, malicious and angry. Bitter people hold grudges forever and a classic example is when they say

I've forgiven him/her but I will never forget...

Bitterness is a frozen form of latent anger and resentment. Bitterness grows out of our refusal, to let go when someone or something is taken from us. Bitterness is being constantly hurt by a memory and is holding onto a hurt until it has a hold on you.

(In the case of my mother in law, she was a serial cheat and when the shoe was on the other foot, she has never moved on... and it makes her even more upset that all her previous boyfriends are now happily married have loving children with their wife and beautiful grandkids)

Normally bitter people have an amazing memory for the tiniest detail,
and they wallow in self-pity and resentment.
They record every offense in their and are always ready to show others how much they have been hurt.
Bitter people defend their grudges constantly:
they will constantly claim that they have been hurt too deeply and too often,
and that this exempts them from forgiving.
Their hearts are sometimes so full of resentment that they no longer have the capacity to love.

kumari wrote:

tikachu wrote:

I personally think bitterness is just a security blanket or shield.  These woman are actually quite insecure, and to protect themselves they feel that they need to act a certain way to show that they are independent and strong, when really it does the opposite.  There are so many other ways to go about proving that you are a strong woman.

I don't think so.
Bitter women don't act strong. They usually are strong.
In many cases, evil, vindictive, malicious and angry. Bitter people hold grudges forever and a classic example is when they say

I've forgiven him/her but I will never forget...

Bitterness is a frozen form of latent anger and resentment. Bitterness grows out of our refusal, to let go when someone or something is taken from us. Bitterness is being constantly hurt by a memory and is holding onto a hurt until it has a hold on you.

(In the case of my mother in law, she was a serial cheat and when the shoe was on the other foot, she has never moved on... and it makes her even more upset that all her previous boyfriends are now happily married have loving children with their wife and beautiful grandkids)

Normally bitter people have an amazing memory for the tiniest detail,
and they wallow in self-pity and resentment.
They record every offense in their and are always ready to show others how much they have been hurt.
Bitter people defend their grudges constantly:
they will constantly claim that they have been hurt too deeply and too often,
and that this exempts them from forgiving.
Their hearts are sometimes so full of resentment that they no longer have the capacity to love.

I guess that makes sense.  Thanks for enlightening me haha